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At first, it's about us...
Many parents experience feelings of loss and mourning. They cry or feel inconsolable without being able to understand why they feel so bad.
Some parents will experience loneliness and isolation, especially if they cannot talk to anyone. Some are very fearful of the reactions of family, friends or neighbours.
Some feel guilty and wonder if they are to blame.
Then there are concerns about our sons and daughters...
Parents adjust as they learn more and talk with other people.They begin to understand the difficulties their sons and daughters have been going through alone and sometimes feel guilty that they did not know at the time.
Some of us become interested in the wider context...
As parents change, they see the benefits as well as the disadvantages of having an LGBT son or daughter. They are less threatened by different opinions and are more likely to challenge homophobic remarks.
Being better informed, parents now recognise the injustices perpetrated against the LGBT community and often want to do something about it.
Some may attend events such as Pride marches and take part in political activism. Others devote themselves to working within their places of worship, their workplaces or their communities in order to make a difference.
Some parents will recognise here the forward progress they have made, or want to make. Part of the work of Families Together London is to support parents in this journey. See: Welch Griffin and Wirth (1996) Beyond Acceptance: Parents of Lesbians and Gays Talk About Their Experiences. St Martin's
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How we change |